Stop trying to be "Beautiful"

All of these women are what the world would consider beautiful, sexy, and everything that a guy would want. They have the perfect bodies, the perfect smile with pearl white teeth, the most amazing golden skin-tone, and hair that stays perfectly in place no matter what they do. These women are our idols. These are the women that we work our tails off to mirror. 

All three of these perfect women have something in common: photoshop and plastic surgery. 

So why then, do we work so hard to achieve something that is literally impossible? Why do we spend hours beating ourselves up because we don't look like these women? They aren't real. This picture that we paint in our minds of how we're supposed to be is what messes us up so much. Our generation's self-esteem is ruined because of these expectations. Now, while this blog seems to be targeting the unrealistic expectations of how women are supposed to look, this also goes for the men of our generation. Women expect a man that looks like Channing Tatum or Chris Hemsworth...Ladies, they're fake, too. If you set you're expectations on these people who are not real, then they will never be achieved. Don't get this confused with lowing your standards. I'm simply saying that maybe both men and women should re-check their expectations to meet reality. But reality is not bad people...That's our problem. We think that reality is horrible. Reality is exactly what we make it. We make our own reality. So if you think that reality is terrible, then maybe you should look in the mirror instead of looking around you. You have the power to at any moment to decide that your story is going to change. If you don't like something that is in your life, or if you're unhappy, then you have the power to change or eliminate those things. It's your story. You are the author of your life. 

Now let me touch on what is really beautiful: 

This little girl was diagnosed with cancer about three years ago. She lost all of her hair, her energy, and her childhood, but yet, she still smiles. She loves her story. She has a family that loves her, friends that love her, but most importantly, she has a God that loves her. If she can smile, so can you. 

These two children are victims of starvation in Ghana, Africa. They were able to receive help from the United Nations International Children's Emergency Fund and are now in good health. They spent most of their childhood with minimal clothing, food to keep them barely alive, and wonder if they'd see tomorrow. If they can smile, so can you. 

You are beautiful. You are exactly what God intended for you to be. If there is anyone in your life that makes you think otherwise, then it's time to change your story. Change your story so there are no evil people. Easier said than done, right? WRONG. It's as easy or as hard as YOU make it. We tend to forget that things are the way that we make them. People are only in our lives as long as we let them be. Whatever is taking away your smile, eliminate it. 

Some of the best advice that has ever been given to me was this: Try to find a companion that is so focused on God that he (or she) has to look to Him, to see you. Only then have you found a man (or woman). The rest are only boys (or girls). 

The most important thing I want you readers to take from this blog is simply that you are the author of your life. At any moment, you have the ability to change anything. Stop comparing yourselves to those women that are photoshopped and have more plastic than a Barbie doll. Don't make that your story. Don't waste your story on unrealistic expectations. You only get to write one book. Make it worth reading. 

Who Controls You?

God has a plan for your life. The enemy has a plan for your life as well. Be ready for both. Just be wise enough to know which one to battle and which one to embrace. 

I feel the need to bring to your attention what the voices of each of these people will bring to you, so that when the time comes, you will recognize good from evil. Lets start off with a little chart: 

God's Voice: 

Calms

Conforts

Convicts

Encourages

Enlightens

Leads

Reassures 

Stills

Satan's Voice:

Obsesses 

Worries

Condemns

Discourages

Confuses

Pushes

Frightens

Rushes

Remember those things. Think of that situation that is eating you up right now. Who has control of it? God or Satan? It's up to you. 

We tend to let the opinions of other people control who controls us. The goal of this blog is to get us all to this midset: "I don't care what other people think. I care about what God thinks and what God wants for my life." 

This mindset is something that I've been working on for about the past month or so. It isn't easy. It takes practice and hard work. 

I was talking with a good friend about a week ago, and he told me something that I'll never forget. He said, "How do you expect other people to accept who you are when you don't even know who you are?" 

Now, this kind of caught me off guard a little bit, because I felt like I knew who I was. I'm a pretty confident person for the most part and I don't act like someone that I'm not. As he explained his comment further, I came to understand what he meant a little more. It's not that I wasn't confident or that I was being fake. It was more that I was too worried about things that were out of my control. I was letting Satan's voice control my life. I was worried and confused and frightened. Not a piece of me was calm or still. 

So, how do we get to that point where we don't worry about things that are completely out of our control? Well, it's easier said than done. First of all, you have to recognize those situations where the control is out of your hands. Ask yourself this question: What can I do to change the situation? 

If the answer to that question isn't direct to you, then it is out of your control. If the answer isn't something that you can change within yourself, then it isn't in your hands. If the situation is out of your control, then move on. The thing about people is, you can only help as much as the other person allows you to. Don't waste your time or effort trying to help someone who doesn't want your help. I've been down that road and I promise you, it isn't worth it. You end up drowning while you're trying to be someone else's anchor. 

The thing that screws us up the most in our lives is that unrealistic picture in our heads of how things are "supposed to be"... REALITY CHECK: NO ONE IS PERFECT. That family you see at church every week that has it all together...guess what? They don't really have it all together. That mom you see at the gym that brings her three perfectly behaved kids with her and is in tip top shape? Guess what...she's not perfect either. Once you realize that that picture in your head is Satan's voice, you'll be in a much better place. Satan is tricky. One of my favorite things I've ever heard is this: "Satan doesn't come dressed in a red cape and thorns; He comes dressed as everything you've ever wanted." 

It's so true. That picture is Satan. Stop thinking that your life is supposed to be perfect. Even when you get to the point of hearing God's voice instead of Satan's, your life still won't be perfect. It's all about your perspective and how you handle things. Your life is a result of your choices. If you don't like your life, then its time to start making better choices. 

In the end, it doesn't matter how many likes you get on your Facebook post. It doesn't matter what Suzy or John think of you. It doesn't matter how much money you have or what kind of car you drive. What matters is how you see things. Do you see a weed or do you see a wish? 

What is your favorite sin?

You are a sinner. You make mistake after mistake. Sometimes you even make the same mistake over and over again. You have a favorite sin. You know, that one sin that you hate to love and love to hate. That sin that you swear you'll never commit again and then you do it again anyway. Maybe you even have several favorite sins. You commit these favorite sins and then you find yourself begging for forgiveness the next day. This is a routine. Sin, slight pleasure, guilt, denial, realization, begging for forgiveness, and then repeat.
Now, hopefully by now, you have an idea of what your favorite sin is. Something has popped into your head while reading this blog post. And now you're in that stage where you're thinking about how awful you feel for realizing that you have a favorite sin. DON'T. Stop right there. NEWFLASH: It's not just you. Everyone has a favorite sin. Everyone. Your mom, your neighbor, even that one person at church that seems to have it all together and a one way ticket to heaven.
Now read this next sentence VERY slowly and carefully:

YOUR SINS DO NOT DEFINE YOU; What you do about your sins does. 

So what does that mean exactly? Well, too many people let their sins define them. They like to drink, so they're obviously an alcoholic, right? They like to go out and party every now and then, so they're obviously a trouble maker, right? They let the occasional curse word slip, so they must cuss like a sailor, right? WRONG. 

This is where the world gets so screwed up. See, the wonderful thing about sins is they've already been paid for. So does that mean you go out and sin and sin and sin, and it's okay because they've already been paid? NO. That would be like going bankrupt and then spending all the money on your new credit card just because your credit started over. You just don't do that. You learn from it.

Now let's go to the second part of the statement: What you do about your sins does. If you're the kind of person that commits a sin and then decides you're automatically doomed to hell, then you're probably right. Don't be that person, because it's not true. You aren't doomed to hell...
Get up, wipe the dust off and try again to be better. The number of times that you can be forgiven is endless, however, do not confuse this with thinking that you can sin and then turn around and be forgiven. That's not how it works. The problem with us sinners, is that sometimes we forget what repentance really is.

In Webster's Dictionary, the actual definition of repentance is the act of repenting; sincere regret or remorse. KEY WORD: SINCERE.
If you are sincere about your repentance of a sin, then you are committing to a life style change. You are saying that you will make a true effort to not commit that sin anymore.

So what will you decide about your favorite sin? Will it define you? Or will you overcome it and beat the title that comes along with it? Only you can decide. Only you can make your favorite sin become your favorite call to repentance.

Give away your sins. Let them go. Don't let them decide who you are. Defeat them. For if you give away your sins, you will come to know Christ.

He is the ultimate comforter. He is the ultimate friend and brother. He will be by your side when you're giving up on those sins. He will be there to be your cheerleader. He is not going to be only at the finish line. He is not in front of you. He is not behind you. He is beside you, every step of the way. When everyone else is gone, he is there. You need only be still.

How To Be Truly Beautiful

See, the world is cruel. The world is ugly. The world will tell you time and time again that you're not good enough. The world will tell you that in order to be "pretty" or "beautiful" that you have to be a size zero and have flawless skin. The world will tell you that you have to have the perfect body shape, perfect hair that curls or straightens to look like a Pantene commercial. They will tell you that in order to be beautiful, you have to look just like those Victoria Secret models. 

Forget the world for a second and listen to me. The weight on a scale is NOT what makes you beautiful. The $500 pair of designer jeans and that $1200 pair of Jimmy Choo pumps do NOT make you beautiful. 

What makes you beautiful is the way YOU see yourself. What makes you beautiful is when you can look yourself in the mirror and remind yourself that no matter what the world says, YOU ARE good enough. When you see yourself as beautiful, the world around you will see you as beautiful. When you are beautiful on the inside, it shines outward. Internal beauty extends to outward beauty. If you have outward beauty, good for you, but that only goes as far as the eye can see. When people can see into your soul, and they think THAT is beautiful, you have achieved true beauty. So be truly beautiful. Be the kind of beautiful that makes people want to be more like you. Be the kind of beautiful that makes people realize what true beauty is. 

It is so sad when I come across a person who thinks that they are not beautiful because they don't look like the people on the front of a tabloid. NEWSFLASH: Thats not real. Those people are fake. 

So take time and really think about what kind of beautiful you're trying to achieve. 

Here's a little video clip from one of my favorite people on this planet: Hope this makes you smile a little bit. 

His Grace is Sufficient

This talk given by Brad Wilcox changed my life. It helped me to realize just how loving and kind our Savior is. Please take a break from your crazy schedules at some point and listen to Brad Wilcox's words. I promise it will be time well spent.

The Light of Christ

Today, as I attended my Sunday church meeting, a continual message kept popping up with each person who spoke. Each of the speakers had a common theme of bringing others unto Christ, even if it is just one soul. A scripture was quoted that can better summarize this recurring theme:
Doctrine and Covenants 18:15-16

 15 And if it so be that you should labor all your days in crying repentance unto this people, and bring, save it be one soul unto me, how great shall be your joy with him in the kingdom of my Father!

 16 And now, if your joy will be great with one soul that you have brought unto me into the kingdom of my Father, how great will be your joy if you should bring many souls unto me!

A question was asked by one of the speakers that I want to invite all of you to consider. He asked this: 

"Can you think of a person who's life would be better with the light of Christ in it?" 

Of course, we all thought of someone, as we as Christians firmly believe that everyones life would be better with the presence of the light of Christ. He then invited us to write down the person that popped into our heads. I invite you to do the same. 

The purpose of this exercise was to inform us that that person didn't just come out of no where; it came from the Holy Ghost. Your mind was directed to that person, or that family, because you might be the only person in this world that can help them find the light of Christ, even if it be for the first time, or for the hundredth time. 

Being an example of Christ is the best tool you can use when trying to bring others unto Christ. If you're trying to bring others unto Christ, yet you're not trying to live as an example of Christ, how do you expect them to develop that light? 

This message is a short one, but I felt that it needed to be shared. I hope that you are able to find the courage to bring others unto Christ. If you're struggling to find the light of Christ yourself, I pray that you will utilize the tools that we have been given, such as scripture, to find that light. The resources are there for you. 

I want to leave you with a quote that was said by Jeffery R. Holland that will hopefully give you that push to prayer for your answers, whether you are trying to be an example of Christ, or if you're trying to gain belief and a testimony of him. 

It is not MY will, but THY will be done.

This is a pin that I ran across while scrolling through my Pinterest this morning. My initial thoughts were extremely selfish, as certain things in my life right now are not going the way I wanted them to. I was even a little bit bitter towards this certain pin when I saw it. More than once, I have asked myself why things aren't going the way that I thought they should have gone. I'm trying my best to be a Christ-like person, I reach out to those in need, I dive into the words of the Lord every so often, I pray daily, so why can't anything in my life seem to go right? It's one thing after the next. 

At about 1:00 pm today, I received a message via Facebook from an old friend letting me know how much she needed to read my last blog post and how much better it made her feel. She said she admired me for putting my love for God out there and not being afraid of what other people thought. 

Little did she know, that her message made me realize what a selfish and ungrateful person I have been lately. The number of times I talk about what I want in a day should be illegal. She caused me to think about this pin that I saw earlier this morning. 

God isn't punishing me. God isn't trying to make me miserable. God is saving me. God is helping me become the person that he meant for me to be. 

So often, I have to remind myself that it isn't MY will, but it is HIS that will be done. Sometimes, we interfere with what God wants and our plans that we make for ourselves end up wrecking us, like the pin says. God never wants that. He wrecks the plans that we make for ourselves because he knows all and he knows that our plans may be what ends up wrecking us. 

Have you ever prayed for something over and over again? Something that you think you got the answer for, but you ignore it because it isn't the answer you wanted? God gets sick of giving us the same answers over and over again. Eventually, he will just let us have our way. 

I spent two years of my life praying about something that I knew wasn't right. God had, in different ways, told me no over and over again. "No" is NOT what I wanted to hear. I, being the selfish person that I am sometimes, ignored God and continued to pray to him about this endeavor that I was pursuing. Eventually, I didn't get a "No" anymore. I didn't get anything. So that obviously meant that God thought that it was okay now, right? WRONG. And let me tell you, boy did it wreck me. 

Now, I'm sure that this has never happened to any of you because I know you're not ever as selfish as I am, but I felt the need to share this message. So why, when you seem to be doing everything that you can to be a Christ-like person, does it seem that nothing is going right? When pondering this specific question, I came across a quote by Thomas S. Monson that is well known: "We can't direct the winds, but we can adjust the sails." So what exactly does that quote have to do with God wrecking our plans that will eventually wreck us? Well, it simply has to do with our attitude. When you put your full trust in the Lord, he will steer us in the direction that we need to go. He has full control of the winds, and it is up to us how we will adjust the sails. 

As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.

I’m lined up to shoot the game winning shot. Come on, it's just a free throw. I’ve done these time and time again. This shot wins us the game. Shake off the nerves and shoot.

The ball circles the rim. The anticipation for whether it will go in or fall off the side of the basket is killing me.

Just when I thought I might pull off a win for my whole team, the ball falls off the side.

Cheers and shouts are all around me.

"We won! We're going to the championship!"

I made that possible. I made it possible for myself to feel like the LVP....the least valuable player.

I just allowed the opposing team to go to the championship game. I just let my entire team down.

Have you ever looked around a room, and without anyone even saying a word, you know that they don't want you there? You feel their negative energy and can almost see it radiating off of their faces like a ray of sun burning through your soul.

That's how I felt in this very moment. My team was disappointed in me. My team, it felt at that time, hated me. I lost the game. There was no turning back; nothing I could do to possibly fix the mess I had just created.

Sometimes, we feel like we've let the world down. We're not good enough or worthy enough to be considered a winner. You plea for something, anything to go right in your life, and just when you think it can't get any worse, life proves you wrong. You're not really sure just how much more you could possibly take.

I tell you this story and these feelings because I've felt this over and over again in my life. I've been that person to walk into a room full of people that didn't want me there, more than once. I've been that person that didn't think they could handle much more. I've been that person who wondered if others lives would be better off without me.

I've also been that person who was slapped in the face by God by thinking those things.

Now, I'm sure that some of you who are reading this are sitting there thinking "Oh no, not another God centered preachy blogger...", but this goes beyond being "preachy". This goes beyond God himself. This post is to give you a glimpse of Gods love, understanding, comfort, and even that which many people forget to mention -- Gods anger.

Imagine yourself as an artist. You have your biggest and most famous showcase coming up. Thousands of people will be at the show to witness and to observe what you consider to be perfect artwork.

The night of the show is finally here. Your guests start showing up. As they observe your pieces of art, you start to notice that every piece is being drawn or painted upon. You go up to one of the guests and ask them what they are doing to your perfect piece of art. They answer with, "Your art is good, but it is no where near perfect. I'm just trying to help you achieve greatness. This piece of art can hardly be called that. It needs a lot of help."

You do this several times as people are doing this to every single piece of your artwork. You receive similar answers as the previous one that your artwork needs help. You created it in your image, not theirs. You created it perfectly in your eyes, not in theirs. To you, this artwork is everything you meant for it to be. How could these people come in and destroy what you considered perfection?

This is how God feels when we try to "fix" ourselves. To him, we are his perfect artwork. He is the all-mighty artist.

Now what does this have to do with the first story I told?

When we feel unwanted or that we are not desired, we tend to point our fingers at ourselves. We try to fix whatever it is that people don't like about us.

We spend 5 hours a day practicing our free throws so that next time, we won't miss the winning shot.

Take a minute to really think about the rest of the game. Look at it a different way. You got the last shot because the other team fouled on you. You got the OPPORTUNITY to win the game. We can't win everything in life, and from those losses, we gain knowledge. We figure out what we need to work on, but it isn't by any means, completely our fault. You didn't play the game by yourself. You didn't score fewer points than the other team by yourself.

Just like life, you didn't cause others to dislike something that you did by yourself.

It's not on your hands the way that others choose to react to your situations.

Sometimes, well, a lot of the time, we beat ourselves up over something that we cannot control. So what do we do when these trials confront us and tear us apart?

In Isaiah 41:10, it says, “Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.”

Give your problems to God. Jesus Christ didn’t suffer for your sins so that you could suffer them, too. Jesus Christ didn’t hang from a wooden cross, with a crown of thorns on his head, nails in his hands and feet, and a spear in his side so that you could feel the pain of guilt or of loneliness.

The wonderful thing about Jesus Christ is that he is whatever you need him to be: a support system, a friend, a brother, a comforter, a listener, an advice-giver, the list goes on.

Now, you may be one of those people who shake their head at the statement I just made.

Maybe you’re one of those people who has tried the whole “Christian religion thing” and you find that you don’t believe there really is a God.

Let me be the first one to tell you, this is one of those situations that ARE all on you. YOU have to allow the Savior to be a part of your life. YOU have to allow him to act as the friend, brother, comforter or whatever it is that you need. YOU have to have faith that he will take care of you. He will carry your burdens.

Now, with that being said, just because you have faith in God and believe in him doesn’t mean that you will make that game winning shot in every single game you play.

It means that you will have the confidence and the ability to have the opportunity to decide how you will act after that shot is taken. Whether you make it or not, decide before how you will act. Will you let Satan have power over you? Will you allow yourself to be brought down by the people that you are surrounded by? Or will you get up, practice your free throws and dominate at the next game?

You decide your fate. You decide who you will follow, but “as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” (Joshua 25:15)